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Comments For Bard Rising
Oh lovely! That is a beautiful opening. I am looking forward to reading the other two parts.
I like how there's almost a haunting aspect here, with Maglor's voice carrying on the wind, waking Nerdanel from bed...
I liked this line:
"But she knew him, her very own Makalaurë, left behind on the shores on the other side of Arda."
Both because it shows the relationship between them, and also because it's Maglor, not Nerdanel, who is being described as being left behind. I usually see the opposite, so this is an interesting change!
This is thought-provoking, too. It makes me want more, to find out what each of them has been doing throughout the histories they lived through and aren't mentioned in.
I like the hopeful ending, as well!
Wow, this was a powerful story, very emotionally raw. Her iteration of all that she was leaving to the jewels--the good, the bad, the domestic--was just perfect for me and really showed a life lived through all the ups and downs and many trivialities that marriage brings. Her reaction to the stones made me think: Is she getting an inkling of what he experiences from them, why they have so commanded his attention? Or, if he truly put his heart into them, as he says in the Silm, is she seeing the purity of his goodness before he was corrupted? Definitely thought-provoking.
I loved the glimpse of the twins too, characters not seen often on their own.
I hope you continue this story. I like your Maglor voice.
Poor Nerdanel. She deserved to go on and live again; but it must have been hard to put her sons, emotionally, in the past. A good vignette.
I like fics where Elrond likes his foster-father! Well done. It is a beautiful piece.
Very sweet! Thanking jdav for recommending it! Best way to start a day.
Rhaps, I had a chance to read this and just wanted to say I absolutely loved it. It reminded me of a certain Elf Nurse sitting with a kitty or two seated on his lap.
I enjoyed this very much, the imagery is beautiful! I want to snuggle the kitty!
Author's Response: Awww, yes you have a live example at home, including some ninja-kittens. This leaves me to ponder how Miuro would be as a daddy-cat, hehe. I am glad you enjoyed it and thanks for reading!
Very nice and heart-warming story! :)
Author's Response: Thanks Binks, I hope that Kitty approved as well!
What a lovely story for cat
slaves lovers! Elrond always has his Feanorian past close to him, doesn't he?
As I told a friend... of all the things: I at least know cats! But my pleasure, after I wrote this I really started to miss having a cat around :) And yes, I thought about it and tried to portray Elrond as someone who wants to pass on the good things that he experienced (like having a warm foster parent) instead of re-living the dark times constantly.
Awww… I love the imagery of the two sitting together on the chair. The comparisions to Elrond's past are also wonderful.
Author's Response: Thank you Indy, Pandë was a strong advocate for Miuro to snuggle on Elrond's lap, so with a bit of re-writing... But it feels right somehow, Elrond having a feline companion!
Awww ... how sweet, Rhapsy! :) There is hope even for the smallest critters in Middle-earth, it seems. What a nice little story to start my day--thank you!
Author's Response: Any time. I hardly write fluff, but this little critter shoved everyone else aside and charmed me immensely. I was thinking about the fall of Eregion and wondered: perhaps more than elves found a safe haven in Rivendell and before I knew it this plot-kitty had climbed into my legs.
What a sweet story! I like the way it ties so many threads of Elrond's past together.
Author's Response: Miuro is a very charming kitten and his fanclub is growing rapidly. I am so glad that you liked the threads from Elrond's past, I couldn't resist to add a bit of Maglor's compassion here :)
This is just lovely. I like the way you mamage to leave Nerdanel with a sense of hope at the end, without minimizing the pain she's going through as she comes to term with the choice she's making.
The language is wonderful. I agree with others who have emphasized this. The story is a lovely balance between loss and hope. I always think that the period Feanor's exile in Formenos without Nerdanel must have been a preparation for her losing him and their sons when they left Aman, but then nothing really could be. It all becomes so much more final. But in a real sense she had already made her choice; your vignette underlines her realization of that.
I'll echo what Darth said in his picking session - your characteristically lyrical prose reads like a poem. Nerdanel's introspection is intense and carries a realism to it, not just a figure from myth, but a real woman, ruminating over her loss and facing those around her who will (unjustifiably) blame her. She seems to second guess herself here..."If I had only done more" in essence. So much like any one of us. Yet at the end, she comes to a resolution and takes the first step toward healing.
A lovely piece, Rhapsy, and it is so good to see you "back in the saddle." :^)
Oh, and I loved the "Mistress of Death" reference from BoLT1!
This is very emotional, nearly heart-breaking. I said nearly, because this piece also gives hope. I think that the saddest thing about Nerdanel is that she grieved her lost husband and children, but also was very unsure as to what would happen if she saw them again. How could she face them again, knowing all she knew and feeling the blame (and shame) for their doings upon herself. I'm very glad to see that you have made her realize that she wasn't responsible for what they did. Her reaction to that relief is very believable and most poignant.
Thank you for sharing! :)
Author's Response: Thanks Binka for this wonderful review. I think Moms will always feel responsible for those who once depended on her in the past and the fact that none of the seven wanted to stay and follow their dad like that, I hope I managed to convey that in this piece how Nerdanel found peace with that at last. I think she now deserves more happiness! *nidges a muse*
I should not have mentioned yesterday that I wanted to read this after lunch. Not too long after, my coworker came in with a stack of warrants for me, and the day conspired ever after against having any time for fun. Booo! I should know better. :)
This piece is so intense and evocative ... it is hard to know where to begin with what I enjoyed about it. (Although "enjoyed" is a tricksy word here and hard to imagine jiving with such an emotional piece! :) Let's see, the untamed adoration for their father ... I love this! What a beautiful way to put it! It suggests, to me, a certain wildness from the start, something that defies control ... but at the same time, it feels natural, as though it must need be that way. I have in my mind's eye a wild tangle of brambles--untamed--that grow that way because they must. And so the Feanarions became that way because they must. (Yes, I got all of that from one word! :)
Likewise, "the cold sheets of her bed": this stands in such contrast to the preceding paragraph and definitely shows such a sense of loss and loneliness. It is one of those sharp details that says so much.
I love how you show her reaction at the end. That her revelation comes as she kneels to the earth seems just perfect to me, like she is coming out of dream and delusion and re-establishing a connection with the world. This is underscored with those final lines, when I feel somehow that Nerdanel has a lot ahead of her. And that makes me very happy. :) It seems, sometimes, in Silmfic, that Nerdanel as a character is defined by her role in the lives of her sons and husband before the rebellion, and then she is a character who embodies loss and is owned by that. Of course, this is what JRRT has given us to work with, but I love that you've given her something more here, the chance to establish an identity and become something beyond what her husband and sons have made her. Beautiful work, Rhapsody. I'm so glad you got the chance to write this. :)
Just want to put my LJ review here:
Very moving and emotional. The words you have used just paint pictures in my head. She is one of the saddest characters in the book--how forsaken she must have felt when they left her.
My favorite part:
As the years went by, voices resounded through the hallway with quick footfalls, urgency betraying their mischief. Their voices upon being caught, a father’s voice booming, trailing behind them with that surety of thunder following the lightning... All of them were born to lead this rebellion.
I could so imagine to see Celegorm running like that and then his dad going like: Turkafinwë Tyelkormo Fëanorion get back here! In the mean time Caranthir is sniggering as well because he took part as well. :D The contrast from a busy home to a silent one must have been huge for her.
And thanks for telling me at two places how much you loved it! *hugs*
Oh Rhaps! This is so beautifully written! I was very much looking forward to reading your new story and this was so worth the wait. I love the emotions you portray in this. They feel so real, and the shift between her doubts, her fears, and finally determination. For a moment there I was scared she would actually jump!This is amazing work. You haven't lost you touch in the least! "huggles and snuggles".
Hi Lady Roisin, I am so happy that I managed to give Nerdanel a different feel than in the book, more like a 'normal' woman like me and you, dealing with fears, pain and worry as we would. Yet she remains the wise woman she is, however we can't just be strong all the time. That was one of my aims with this piece. There is a tad more backstory as to the why she would never jump, it just takes a bit more before she can let her sons go to focus on others who need her very muchly. Now finding the time to write that short story! Thanks for your wonderful review, I am so happy you liked it and that in a way you could connect to her!
This is absolutely lovely. It seems entirely realistic that in the absence of Feanor and his sons, some of those left behind in Valinor would seek to blame Nerdanel and that she might even seek to blame herself. I like the realization that her children made their own choices and that she's strong enough to continue living. Really, really lovely!
Author's Response: History, even in my family sadly enough, has shown that those who are left behind are the first victims to blame when something goes wrong. I think especially the period after the first kinslaying has happened, the emotions of the victims were immensely raw. To me I think that she as a mother would first seek the blame for all of it by herself, as if she missed something crucial during the upbringing of their sons (trust me, I sometimes have that feeling). But her sons are grown ups now, although I do envision that parents and children share a bond, but in order to move on, a sacrifice has to be made...
Thanks for your wonderful review!
I've always considered the estrangement of Feanor and Nerdanel very tragic and sad and reading your story emphasized this for me. How different things could have turned out if this had not happened, or if she joined him in Middle Earth. It's also a treat to see the spotlight more on Ambarussa here than on the other Feanorions.
I think this also gives a good glimpse of what could have been going through Nerdanel's mind and how she must have felt after being supplanted by the jewels in her husband's regard, truly, they could qualify as "mistresses". Nerdanel's question of why the Valar released Morgoth and how it affected her family is my favorite line. The most heart breaking scene is the part where she actually holds them and addresses them like they were living beings and how even after she denies any more love for him, she still does not want him destroyed. The hopeless romantic in me thinks that if anything, that is still an indication that she loves him.
Author's Response: Yes, she still does love Fëanor, but at what cost? What I tried to bring across was that she had to let go, surrender her love to the other that captured his heart, or be torn asunder herself. We know from canon that her love for the Ambarussa is strong, and for them she has to survive, imho of course. And yes, it is nice to see her youngest being with Nerdanel, it felt natural to me Thank you so much for reading and leaving such a thoughtful review!
This story is compellingly and beautifully constructed. Great story, beautifully done, appropriately scary emotional breakdown, I highly recommend it.
Author's Response: Thank you Oshun!!! I saw your mefa review a few days ago, but I didn't had time yet to reply... It was so tempting to end this short work on a positive note and who knows, at the end of Arda they will be reunited again (in my mind they are, but love can also break your heart and letting go (whether for your own sake or for your lover) can be the greatest act of love as well. In my humble opinion of course! Thanks for reading and making it to the end!
This was wonderful. Such tragic foreshadowing… “Do not destroy him!” But of course, they do destroy him. And Nerdanel seems just the type of character to foresee it. Nice work.
Author's Response: Thanks! :c) She can of course wish all the best for her greatest love, perhaps with a deeper desire that he will grow tired of them and return back to her. Who knows....
That took me a minute to get it! So provoking!
The last thing Nerdanel says to the jewels is so, right, maybe, as he does get destroyed by them. Thought provoking.
Author's Response: I just strongly felt that if Nerdanel felt wronged by those creations that stole her husband's heart, she deserved a chance to speak her mind and gain release. I hardly write her but this bunny demanded to be written! Thanks for your comments!