Comments on Like a Moth to a Flame

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You did a remarkable job with this one. I really enjoyed Carnistir in this and he's the brother I never remember. You made him so real, his gift so plausible that it was perfectly natural that this would be a cause of upset and anxiety to him. Good thing Finrod came along and was willing to stick with him.

As usual your ability to place the reader right in the heart of the action makes your stories a pleasure to read. Your characters are either people we know, or are people we would like to be. In this particular case the scene with the fortune teller and Carnistir's refusal to confirm or deny the details of her reading was a hoot. Her getting more and more frustrated with him was a lot of fun.

The love story at the center is poingant and I have to admit the ending, with the tragic Noldorian undertones made me tear up. Everything about this story really moved me.

Lovely scene-setting and Carnistir's reactions are very believable--and Finrod's, too!

 

I was a little surprised that the quarrel with Angrod at the council did not  seem to be mentioned.

Is that bit about "You’ve forgiven me when . . .” meant to be an allusion to it? (I first read it as referring to Alqualonde and the Helcaraxe.)

 I suppose, in any case, Carnistir's reaction there is well enough motivated by your characterization of Carnistir in general.



Sorry! Sorry! Sorry! about Angrod. Apparently, I am far too subtle for my own purposes! I hate it when people do that to me in a fic--reference things in such a sly or cagey way that one would have to be a textual sleuth to catch their points! I sincerely thought I was being clearer. Yes. I attempted to foreshadow the dispute when I had Carnistir express his casual annoyance with Finrod's brothers early in the story--long years before it happened. And I thought the reference to asking Finrod if he had forgiven him was a crashingly obvious reference to him raising such a stink with Angrod and thereby causing some significant diplomatic problems (although the story was bound to come out sooner or later, in any case!). Additionally, I thought that Carnistir's need to shorten and/or schedule any visits to Nargothrond to avoid intersecting the rest of Finrod's immediate family indicated that he was quite sure the rest of them had not forgiven him!

I felt that to mention the quarrel explicitly would end up making me take me on a chapter and half detour into a happening that was neither a significant part of the main storyline nor even its postscript.

Lesson learned--if you missed my references, who do I think would have spotted them? You me better and the canon as well as almost anyone who might stumble across this story!

I did have another aspect in the story which no one has commented upon yet and may never notice, which concerns Carnistir himself! No, I am not trying to develop the habit of being intentionally obscure in my dotage!

Thanks for reading me, despite all this. I do count on you as part of my "target audience"!

Off of topic a little, I've always thought that Finrod was likely more philosophical about Carnistir stirring up trouble than Maedhros was!

Sorry! I did pick up the references to the issues with the brothers earlier. I think that may actually even be the reason why I expected something more explicit later.

What else have I missed, I wonder? I did notice your particular take on Carnistir's relation with Belegost and how detailed Carnistir's foreknowledge is, but I think that's probably not what you mean.



Yes and no. Mostly, no. But thank you! OK. Now I have to tell. Many years ago, when I first met Dawn, right after my autistic granddaughter had lived with me for almost four years, I read Dawn's AMC and her little Carnistir was just like my autistic granddaughter. So made a comment about her doing such a great job with the character and she told me that she had never intended him to be autistic. But it stuck in my head. And now that my granddaughter is older and more conventionally well-behaved, she is still solidly on the autistic spectrum and a lot like the female version of Carnisitr in my story. (She's also beautiful and brilliant--math is only one of her things she is especially good at.)

I finally had time to be able to read this.  It's an excellent story, beautifully written, as always. Wonderful characterizations.  I really liked Carnistir's voice. Especially liked the shared osanwe, and the settings are so vivid.  Love your sophisticated ability to depict youthful desire, yet tinged with the sadness of what's to come.  I especially enjoyed the scene with the tarot cards.  You know, I've been reading a lot of published novels of late -- rather than fanfic -- but this is better written than most of what I'm reading.   



Woohoo! Thrilled to get a comment from an old friend and one of the most accomplished writers I know. So happy you liked it. (It could use a good going over--so don't look too closely. I will do it eventually--I was just months late for a challenge.)

"You know, I've been reading a lot of published novels of late -- rather than fanfic -- but this is better written than most of what I'm reading."

That's my goal. Most of the time I feel very presumptuous to even admit it, since I often feel so far off the mark. I don't write nearly as much fiction as I should. But reading really does help, don't you think? I know so many terrific fanfic writers, but one does profit a lot from getting out of the fanfic ghetto and reading more widely. I do that. [Ha! That's my only writers-workshop point that I stand by year in and year out: if one wants to write, read good writing.]

I love coming-of-age stories myself. I love the heartbreak and nostalgia of Silm fic approached from the good moments. One does not have to write tragic dark fic to tear the reader's heart out in The Silmarillion fandom.