Comments on A Huntress Among Fools

The Silmarillion Writers' Guild is more than just an archive--we are a community! If you enjoy a fanwork or enjoy a creator's work, please consider letting them know in a comment.

Isilme_among_the_stars has requested the following types of constructive criticism on this fanwork: Fulfilled Intent, Mood/Tone, Style. All constructive criticism must follow our diplomacy guidelines.

I have a great deal of sympathy with Aredhel's frustration here!

Very convincingly described.

Looking forward to reading the other chapters!

It does get darker! 

I continued to sympathize with her and her POV a lot.

Her grief for Argon is moving and the family dynamics are convincing.

The last chapter made me wonder whether this might be an Aredhel, who is quite happy to go to Gondolin, at least at first.

Despite all the danger and grief she has already been through and her courage and restlessness, she doesn't seem quite ready to face a war.

Which is reasonable enough!  But perhaps not so very practicable, at this point.

 

Yes, it really does. I didn't intend it to start with but it seemed to naturally kind of gravitate in that direction. 

Argon does a bit lost in the text as the Silmarillion moves on so quickly, as does the grief and hardship Fingolfin's host must be facing after the Helcaraxe. So I was keen to include it and see how it might impact how it might have influenced early events at Lake Mithrim. It's really good to hear that the family dynamics were believable. 😊
She's really prepared for the reality of war I think. I remembered that at this point Fingolfin's people have really only faced one battle in Middle Earth, and I don't think that the realities would have really set it compared to the somewhat idealised picture that Fëanor gave in Valinor. All of them are a bit naive to war at this point, but the Fëanorians have a bit more experience. I really wanted to explore the tension there might be as reality starts to set in. Perhaps there are some people having regrets.
Thank you for reading and for your thoughtful comments! 😊

I do wonder how a people living in the peace of paradise, especially those born there, can have such experience at fighting that they can win their first big battle, and can only assume that the folk who made the Great Journey and lived under the threat of Morgoth's minions, passed on their knowledge and skills. All this is so new to them. So I really appreciate your explorations of the various gloseed-over factors.

I love that you wrote these events from Aredhel's pov. Her feelings of being cooped up and purposeless are so relatable, as is her sense of freedom later when her skills and desires combine with a real purpose. 

Omg, Fingon! I have a friend who is talented in so many ways, stupidly courageous, damn good looking, and has the bloody cheek to be a really nice guy on top of it all. They could have been twins!! (Although he doesn't have gold ribbons in his hair, but maybe I'll suggest them.)

I really like that you included Argon, or rather the effects of his death on his family. He's so often less than not mentioned, as if he's totally forgotten, and her family's reactions to his loss are so understandable here. I also like your characterisations of each. 

Clumsy Thorondor just dumping them ... and finding that Fingon's arm was broken in the process is just too funny!

And then in the final chapter, Aredhel's thoughts about gearing up for war and how that changes people are still just so relevant to modern times. There are better solutions than war, but, well, that's a whole other story.

All in all an enjoyable, and thoughtful, read! Thank you!

Thank you for reading and commenting Aérea! I'm glad that you enjoyed it!
Yes, how dare he be perfect in so many ways?! Your friend sounds awesome, btw!
The idea of Fingon and Maedhros hopping on the back of an Eagle, as aerodynamically improbable as that is, has always kind of bothered me. Hence, I wanted to imagine what manner of carrying might have been more probable, and have a little fun with it along the way. I'm glad you found that part entertaining.
Yes, this comment you make about gearing up for war is unfortunately all too true, although I wish it were not so relevant.