One Flesh, One Soul. Part I by FellFireFan  

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Secrets Between Us

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Alone, Aegnor stood upon the main promenade of Norgothrond. Two cascading underground waterfalls stood on each side. Vines lined with a ghostly bioluminescent glow veined around the grand round balcony of Finrods dwelling. Tall lamps ablaze with flickering flames stood like radiant beacons, casting their warm glow upon the vast and mysterious kingdom. A world far removed from the comforting embrace of sunlight and all that was familiar to Aegnor, who very much preferred affairs above ground.

As he waited, a meek female attendant offered Aegnor a delicate glass of wine, presented to him upon a silver plate. She held it beneath his nose, her eyes not meeting his. He took the glass with an elegant sweep of his hand and sipped.

After enjoying the taste of the velvety elixir, Aegnor's gaze descended upon the unfathomable chasm below him. His mind was consumed by the memory of his regrettable deeds at the gathering several months prior, actions that had left Finrod ominously silent ever since.  Just then, a lone figure approached from behind him. His long, unbound hair flowed behind, smooth as fine silk.

"Only you would infiltrate my kingdom Aegnor, without prior warning and leaving nary a trace for my vigilant guards!" The angelic voice of Finrod echoed out in an affectionate tone of light hearted sarcasm.

"I did not wish to disturb your slumber... brother," Aegnor softly replied.

"Disturb my slumber?" Finrod scoffed, his voice catching a heavy glint of irony. "Were it not for my cherished assortment of exquisite ornaments that you inadvertently smashed with your clumsiness, perhaps my guards would not have been compelled to chase you through my abode, onto the rooftop, where you were promptly recognized before they discharged their arrows...perhaps I would still be slumbering!"

"I tried, Finrod... You did not return a single missive I had sent to you!" Aegnor responded, his voice tense. Finrod chuckled softly, and striding towards a small silver casket, he brought it to Aegnor and presented its contents to his eyes.

"Are these the ones you sent?" He asked. The contents revealed a meticulously bound collection of nearly a hundred opened letters, bounded neatly together with a ribbon. "I have read every one, alas, the demands of ruling a kingdom leave me scant time to pen even a solitary letter these days," Finrod beamed warmly. He cast his gaze upon his youngest brother, whose sorrowful eyes remained fixated on the silver box in his grasp. A tender hand rested upon Aegnor's arm, "You presumed a chill had overtaken my love for you. Regardless of your questionable discernment, little brother, never would I withdraw my affections toward you,"

Smiling gently, Finrod returned the box to its place.

"Perhaps you should this time, for I am nothing but a fool!" Aegnor grumbled. His robust arms folding on the flat, stone balustrade. "Once again, I brought shame to you... and our noble house,"

His head sank low, consumed by a flood of remorse that coursed through his being. Finrod poured himself a glass and joined his brother, standing close beside him. He took a long, thoughtful sip and tensed his lips. His light grey eyes fixed forward.

 "Do you recall a certain chest from our youth? The one atar always kept locked?" He asked.

"Yes..." Aegnor replied, "the key was lost and it could not be opened,"

"No, Aegnor... do you not remember? Atar fabricated the tale of the lost key. Truth was, he had it in his possession the whole time." Finrod paused, "and so, we all fell for his ruse and were content to admire the chest with closed minds." Finrod placed his glass down upon the balustrade, his smile drawing wider, "that was... of course, all of us... except for you,"

 His eyes fixed in Finrod's as he continued, "you Aegnor, were not so gullible and easily saw through his deception and hassled poor atar relentlessly to reveal the key you knew was hidden in his mantle. Even his unbending patience was worn thin by you and he revealed the key to our eyes and opened the chest."

Aegnor, his brow furrowed asked, "What was inside?" Finrod's answer came with a solemn tone.

"Nothing... nothing at all." he replied calmly. "The chest was empty. But by the mere act of locking it, atar instilled a belief within us that a great secret resided inside, and that was the lesson he sought to teach us. If we allow the words and actions of others into our minds and hearts, we lose the ability to control the outcome." 

"Why do I not recall any of this?" Aegnor whispered, his mind searching.

"You were very young then, Aegnor. Not even yet the tender age of a youth, but even in those early years, atar discerned the immense strength that dwelled within you, a formidable power indeed. Yet, your eager persistence also revealed a great weakness that was easily exploited by the contents of a valueless chest,"  

Aegnor's demeaner sank as he absorbed Finrod's message "Observing you in Hithrim, how effortlessly Celegorm inserted himself into your head, poisoning your thoughts... and all the raw force you exerted upon him in that moment reminded me of atar's great concern. I confess, I am deeply worried for you," The intensity in Finrod's eyes gravely wounded Aegnor. Aegnor evaded his gaze completely

"Aegnor..." Finrod called softly, Aegnor finally looked at him, "Is there any truth to what he claimed about you... with a maiden?"

Aegnor found himself trapped. He released a long, troubled sigh and thinned his lips. "I had not wished for you to learn of this in such manner," His voice laced with a palpable sense of defeat. "It is true... there is a maiden who has captured my attention. We were dear friends once.... yet.... I can no longer ignore the cries of my guarded heart." He sighed deeply, turning around, leaning back against the ornate balustrade. A tremor passed through him, his fragile voice trembling as he continued, "for a moment... I near succumbed to a seductive kiss, the touch of her lips burns still upon my flesh," He murmured.

Finrod received this confession with a solemn nod, his features etched with a calm understanding. At length, he broke the weighted silence. 

"This maiden of whom you speak, Aegnor... is she someone known to me? A friend whom I have had the honour of meeting before, perhaps?" he asked slowly, chosing his words very carefully. Aegnor paused, the weight of his tumultuous emotions palpable in the hush that followed. 

"Your paths have crossed once before, yes," he answered finally, "but her name... I cannot reveal to you Finrod, at least for now. I must have some time,"

Finrod felt relief. He knew many suitable elf-maidens, all exceptional in loveliness, manner and station. Any of whom would make a fine match for his brother.

"She holds a power over me I am helpless to resist. My body trembles when I hear my name whispered from her breath," added Aegnor and he sank slowly to the ground as is pulled by some weighty burden, his back slumping against the small balustrade pillars, bringing his knees to his chest. He buried his face into his palm as if nursing a sickening, age long migraine. 

"What is this curse that has afflicted me....? This is a torment beyond my endurance!" He murmured quietly

Finrod lowered upon the stone floor, his long legs gracefully folded beneath him. With compassion in his gaze, he beheld Aegnor, his mind traversing the corridors of memory to a time when his own heart had been stirred by a similar emotion.

"Does this fair maiden reciprocate the depths of your affection, Aegnor?" He gently prodded.

"Without shadow of doubt...," he whispered hazily, "she would equally surrender to me as I would to her,"

"Then rejoice my brother, for you have finally fallen under the call of the feä!" Finrod smiled bright and fair. Aegnor lifted his gaze from the palms of his hands, his countenance a tapestry of perplexed irritation, silently yearning for further explanation.

"The ethereal allure that draws kindred souls together, a spiritual bond woven amongst our kin," Finrod explained patiently, "the marital union between the Eldar is forged in this time. The feäs, they beckon to one another, and soon the hröas follow suit. It is a force of unparalleled intensity, an exquisite power that defies explanation. A drawing for physical and emotional intimacy that is far too powerful to resist, and from what I can see, you are well into its advanced stages," He added before continuing again with more thought, "I certainly would recommend a swift engagement without delay, and an even shorter betrothal period once the war has ended. Perhaps seeking a term of absence from her for a while, so the heart may not be so tempted." He added

"This...?" Aegnor grumbled, "this is the elated elevation of grandeur that has sparked the endless, punishing lectures my ears have endured from both you and Angrod!?" His countenance unimpressed and dishevelled stared up at his older brother in defiance. Finrod nodded, his smile blossoming into a radiant grin.

"Pfft! It's nothing at all like you claimed! It is abhorrent and I hate it!" Aegnor barked. Finrod chuckled softly at such a predictable response from his youngest brother.

"It may seem inconceivable now, but in time, you shall come to appreciate its profound beauty. For love, in all its manifestations, is a tapestry woven by the Valar themselves, and one day, you shall find solace within its safe embrace." 

"How long will I feel this way? When will this sickening feeling subside!?" Aegnor's demand hung in the air, charged with raw emotion. He jumped to his feet, his eyes burning into Finrod's, his voice laced with more aggression than he had intended. Finrod couldn't help but find amusement in Aegnor's newfound misery, and a mischievous smile played on his lips.

"From what I know, they will subside once both fëa and hröa have been satisfied...through the joining of sexual union, dawning the age of blissful martrimony. Alas, I too yearn for my beloved, Amarïe, but I have learned to live with this longing, as you will also."

A stunned silence followed Finrod's words as Aegnor absorbed the weight of what was said. The soft glow of bioluminescent lights and flickering fire lamps cast a gentle radiance, enhancing the smooth texture of Aegnor's face.

Finrod took a purposeful stride toward him and placed a warm hand on his broad shoulder, his presence both comforting and commanding.

"Aegnor, my brother, embrace this new chapter in your life. Do not resist its call, nor should you harbour fear within your heart. For the fëa, the ethereal essence deep within us seldom errors in its choice. This maiden, whoever she might be, was destined to cross your path, and soon, you shall find completeness."  

With genuine warmth, Finrod's hand alighted from him. "When the ravages of war have subsided and peaceful times grace our lands once more, I shall stand proudly at your side to witness your sacred vows at the alter and welcome this new addition into our fold,"

A wide, elated grin unfurled upon Aegnor's countenance, his cheeks ablaze with sheer delight. In the wake of Finrod's departure, Aegnor's merriment overflowed, and he danced with unadulterated joy upon the balcony. His lustrous hair twirled around him with every graceful step, casting a spellbinding aura. In that moment, he could scarcely recall a time when he had felt such profound happiness, and he vowed to protect it fiercely. He would never allow it to be taken from him now.

 

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Ladros

381 A.D

 

The debate of paramount importance was held at night, casting a glow upon the large hall. The crackling firelight illuminated the faces of the attendees as raindrops pelted the wooden structure outside. Despite the raging storm, the interior of the hall remained warm and dry, providing solace from the tempestuous weather.

Morgoth's rising power had cast a shadow of fear upon the land of Ladros, compelling the lords of the three houses of men to convene and address the growing concerns. Boromir called for a mandatory meeting to discuss the future of their people. The weight of the decision hung heavily in the air as the lords deliberated whether to stay and endure the encroaching darkness or seek a new home elsewhere.

Among the attendees, Aegnor, sent by Angrod as an observer, arrived cloaked in darkness, his presence unnoticed by the gathering. He silently made his way to the back of the crowd, his keen eyes scanning the hall. Amid the flickering flames, he caught sight of a raven-haired maiden standing beside her brother, who was addressing the lords. Her radiance and serenity shone through. Like a graceful lady, her gaze swept across the concerned faces in the room, each expression reflecting the weight of their worries. It was a room filled with tension and uncertainty. Her eyes moved with a quiet elegance, gliding over the worried brows and furrowed foreheads.

Aegnor stood apart from the rest, leaning against a sturdy support pillar. His features were partially concealed by the hood that cast a shadow over his face. Strands of shimmering golden hair cascading down in a gentle coil like threads of spun gold.

After much deliberation, the decision was reached unanimously—they would leave Ladros, forsaking their ancestral home forever. However, before the men could make a final vote, Andreth entered the circle from the crowd. Boromir granted her the opportunity to address the assembly. With determination, she stepped forward, entering the circle of seasoned men.

Her bearing regal and her words measured, commanding the attention of the assembled lords. Her voice, though tinged with a hint of vulnerability, rang out with conviction.

"Esteemed lords of the Free Peoples, I stand before you as the scion of a noble house, one whose very foundations were laid by the honoured deeds of my ancestor, Beör. It was none other than the elven lord Finrod Felugund, who bestowed these lands upon my forebear - a gift borne of his unconditional love and unbreakable loyalty to our kin."

Her gaze swept the assembly.

"I was granted the privilege of encountering the legendary elf, but once, yet the impression he left upon my heart is indelible. For never have I met a kinder, more generous soul whose love and divinity extended to all under his care. A hush fell over the hall as she paused, her words hanging in the air like a challenge. "I beseech you, noble lords, to consider this: If Beör, our revered ancestor, were to stand among us now, would he flee like a cowardly cur caught in a hailstorm? Or would he, with resolve, sacrifice his very lifeblood to defend what is rightfully his - our lands and our legacy?"

Her voice rang out with a fervent, almost pleading tone, as she awaited the response of the assembled lords. Her impassioned words resonated within the hearts of those present. The silence that followed was pregnant with contemplation and introspection, as each lord weighed the significance of Andreth's plea.

Aegnor watched her from behind his pillar. He hung upon her every word. Her radiance exuded within the hall. It was as though she was a becon of light that illuminated the entire room. In that hallowed moment, the decision that had seemed unanimous moments ago became mired in uncertainty.

"We stay!" The fervent cry echoed through the air, each word filled with determination and hope. The crowd, moved by her impassioned speech, raised their voices in unison, their collective strength overpowering any doubts that lingered. One man rose abruptly from his chair, his voice lashing out like a whip, accusing Andreth of overstepping her place in the realm of men.

Bregor, ever loyal, leapt to her defence without hesitation. With unwavering resolve, he confronted the old man, his voice firm and commanding, silencing the disrespectful accusations. The clash of wills hung heavy in the air, but the unwavering determination of the crowd began to wear down the resistance of the lords.

The news of Ladros' decision to stay resonated through the hall. Grateful gazes washed over Andreth, their eyes filled with admiration and appreciation for the woman who had become their beacon of hope. Older women clustered around her, their voices praising her courage to speak out, but Andreth's fleeting glance fell upon Aegnor. Whose hidden features and fluid movements, she discerned so easily. He slipped away into the night.

Drawn to him, Andreth found herself making her way outside into the wild throws of rain and thunder, heading toward the stables, where she discerned his shadow, moving along the floor within. She entered the stables, aglow with the soft kiss of moonlight. There she beheld him, his back to her, his hood lowered. He was hastily preparing his horse to leave, damp hair from the rain clung to his face. She observed him silently, each movement marked by a stormy fury akin to the torrential downpour outside.

"Aegnor?" she began softly as she approached him, drenched by the relentless rain. Aegnor paused, his gaze fixing intensely upon her, her skin and hair glistening with moisture.

"Return to your house, you did not see me," he murmured, returning to his task only far more slowly than before.

"Aegnor... what is the matter?" She asked gently, stepping closer. A deep troubled sigh blew from his nose and finally, he turned to her. His eye's locking with hers.

"Have you seen war, Andreth?" he muttered, "Nowhere remains to conceal your fear. They sever your feet from your body so you can not run. They sever your hands so you can not fight," Aegnor's voice charged with anger, his words resonating with intensity. "When you can no longer escape, they tear you asunder! Ripping you apart while—"

"Stop it, Aegnor!" she shrieked.

"How can you seek to fight that of which you know nothing!" he roared. His tempered fist struck the wood beside him, resounding in a thunderous thud, the force of which shook the entire structure within. She stood, stunned into a silence, her eyes swelling with tears.

"What an utter fool you are Andreth!" He yelled, his voice breaking with pain, "You have doomed yourself and others! Did you not think of them!?" Tears pooled in her large, round eyes. She swallowed tensely and held his gaze with courage.

"This is our home. We have no other place to run." she replied tenderly, her voice steady with remarkable clarity. "If we fall, we fall facing the rising sun, not the shadow it casts upon the ground, we are the Edain," she muttered, pausing, her voice breaking with unspoken longing. Aegnor stared into her as she stood before him, his expression softening upon her pitiful, drenched form.

"And the children? What say do they have in their own fates while it is decided by those who are sworn to protect them?" He growled

"We all see the darkness Aegnor. Young... old, it makes no difference. He will come, one realm at a time. Their fate shall be ours." She replied steadily.

Aegnors face twisted, unable to believe his own ears. "If you believe for a moment that I am prepared to stand idle while your senseless judgement kills everyone and you, you are sorely mistaken my lady!" He countered.

"It is not your place to decide my fate or the fates of all of us! This is the path I have chosen! And it will not be swayed otherwise! I thought you were different to the men of my people, but even you are seduced by the power you hold over me but you have failed in your efforts to assert your control!"

Aegnor squinted, his face tense with a boiling, restrained rage "Is that what you think?" He muttered, she tensed as he slowly drew towards her, his footsteps creaking the wooden boards lightly with each measured step. "Is that truly how you perceive the depth of my feelings toward you?"

Andreth withdrew, her head dropping to the floor. Her shimmering eyes broke from his penetrating gaze in retreat, "No," she whispered frailly "Forgive my harsh words, they were born from the heat of my anger. I did not mean to wound you, Aegnor." She mumbled

Standing before her shrinking frame, the tension in his stern face melted away, releasing it in a heavy dismissive sigh. The steam from his nose mingled with her damp hair. Aegnor leaned close into her, bringing his lips to her ear. The faint brush of his scent fluttered into her nose as he whispered, "you hold me in the very palm of your hand. Losing you will be an agony I will not be able to endure." His frail confession hung like a lead cloud between them, a single heart-wrenching plea to her to save him. "I will perish without you." He muttered.

Her breath hitched as their eyes met once more. The very veins in her body burned with longing. With his face but a breath from hers, her eyes fell upon his mouth, and his lips drew every fibre within her. Every nerve in her body coiled. She swallowed hard, her voice reduced to a whisper that escaped her trembling lips. Then her eyes found his once more.

"I am sorry, Aegnor..." she whispered, "Even you can not shield me from all things, just as you can not be shielded. Just as the day yields to the night, this truth you must accept. Nor by trial or desire, no matter how deep they run within us. We are powerless to alter this course."

Swift hands seized her as she turned to leave. The hard wood surface met her back as he closed against her. She held his gaze with watering eyes, wide with alarm. Soft rumbles of distant thunder and the lashing of the torrential rain crackled around them as Aegnor pressed her against the wall. Bathed in the soft glow of the nights lonely light.

"You speak with such righteous conviction, but the fear in your eyes reveals the truth! You run from it because it frightens you! Just how long did you think you could hide it from me?" He muttered. Glistening round pools, teary and guileless, stared up at him, searching in the depths of his. "If you truly believe the words you claim, then take your leave now and you will look upon my face nevermore!"

Her quivering lip drooped as a single raw tear fell from her eye. Her chest heaved deeply at his very words. Breath steamed from his nose, his heart aching for understanding and the pain this ultimatum brought them both. Slowly, be brought his hand to the wall, placing it beside her head. His forehead rested upon hers.

"Andreth.... do you truly not feel the burning in my heart?" he whispered.

She felt the pain in his voice. Begging her for release of this anguish. His body melded with hers, pressed together by a force unseen. The soft tingle of his thumb slipped along the plump curves of her mouth, parting them with a gentle pull. She yielded, a shudder rumbling through her body, matching the low growls of the thunder outside. Her eyes fluttered closed and her head fell back against the wood, exposing her long, slender neck. His strong palm enclosed around the vulnerable column of her ivory throat. His voice thick and heavy.

"Is there any chance of a love between you and I..." he purred slowly as he added "without surrendering ourselves utterly?"

The weight of his question hung heavy in the air. Then her eyes flickered open, and her breath caught in her throat. The sting of tears welling up spilt from her eyes, and, with a long, resolute sigh, her gaze turned deeply sad. With a calm strength, she gently lifted his arm and slid out from him, leaving him behind. Her form sinking into the ghostly light of the pale moon and torrential rain.

Left alone, he stared silently into the empty void where she had occupied. She had made her decision, and it was crystal clear to him. His glassy eyes mirrored the anguish of one abandoned by hope and love, lost in a labyrinth of ruminations. The thunder roared, a manifestation of the raging storm that consumed him from within.