IN THE SHIRE-RECKONING by Diane Finnis-Robb  

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Part Two; Chapter Four "The Record of His Return"

   To tell the story of Gondolpho Oldbuck’s return in Year Twenty-Nine of the Shire one must, once again, cross that delicate line between biography and rumour. It is, after all, a one-sided story from the vantage point of history and, as was made clear earlier, rumour and history are never far separated in any examination into the lives of hobbits.

   Many of the old journals of Theudebald Swiftalk and his nephew, then called Theudebert Youngbuck, have been recovered in the excavation of the Great Smials in 1961 of our present Age. So too were the letters that those two hobbits received and saved from the other parties in this drama. These first-person accounts help us to understand the earliest days of the Shire through the eyes of the first hobbits to settle there. But, like all first-person accounts, they are only as reliable as their authors. There were many of those writers who had strong opinions one way or another regarding the events related to the feud of these two families and, in many of these letters, accounts differ greatly. In Year Fifty-Three of the Shire, long after Gondo’s story had come to its most tragic ending, Berty’s sister Deidre penned the very first version of “The Tale of the Tooks and the Bucks''; a story written in verse and to be sold in some of the earliest bookshops found in the north of Middle-earth (that bookshops should be the invention of Shire-hobbits should come as no surprise to anyone who has read this far into their history and, indeed, into this very book). The popularity of Deidre’s tale undoubtedly formed the framework of all subsequent rumours about the feud of the two great families. It is unknown just how much access she may have had to any now missing journals and letters; for her father Twoody was long since dead but her brother Berty had become the first (and only) President of the Shire1 and, by all reports of the day, had become quite possessive of the family archives.

   The version of the story by Deidre Took was written in song (for she was quite gifted in this way and, for a time, she even outstripped her mother’s former fame as a documentarian with her own work as a lyricist). There are numerous versions of the story in differing styles and metres which are found in old copybooks, but no complete version exists to reveal the original form. No original version of “The Tale of the Tooks and the Bucks” has yet been found, though many letters and journals speak of its publication in Year Fifty-three. The fact that no copy of it remained in the archive of the Great Smials seems to indicate that President Took himself did not approve of the story and, as some scholars believe, may have had a hand in its suppression and subsequent loss. But that too is a rumour beyond evidence.

   Some of the verses from Deidre’s tale remain, found in old letters or gossip, but the complete tale, and its tune, were lost by Bilbo’s days. Here is a sample of one section, “Oldbuck Return’d”, which is clearly a later bastardization, rendered in a more simple rhyme scheme, when we compare it to Deidre’s more complex known writings:

“By Road and West and dusk return’d, 

“Past riven rock and tall trees grown, 

“Past homes and holes never known, 

“He came by Road and West return’d.

“In Summerdays’ golden parade, 

“Marching home in uncertain haste. 

“Memories lost, the Buck he chased, 

“To home, to Sarehole, to persuade.”2

   Though the full text of this poem is lost to us now it clearly informs the tale which Goldilocks wrote over fourteen hundred years later. Was the original poem known to her and other hobbits at this time? We cannot say.

   History may not be fully recovered from these days, but the rumour we do know. Letters and other accounts tell us that on the evening of June 20th, in 1630 of the Third Age of Middle-earth, on the first night of Lithe in the Twenty-ninth year of the Shire-reckoning, Gondolpho Bucklestrap, now referred to by those who remembered him as “the Oldbuck”, came walking west down the Great Road with the sun setting behind him. First he came to the old encampment that he and Twoody had made when they met with the Elves at the westernmost edge of the Shire twenty-five years before. And there, or so we can only assume, the Oldbuck was baffled by what he saw.

   Twoody had stopped making his yearly pilgrimage to this place long before this time but he had, for the first seven years after his friend’s disappearance, built a nice little cottage there in the hollow of a very large tree. In that same hollow the Elves of the West had once made a temporary home for their hobbit ambassadors and the Oldbuck’s eye, upon returning, was caught in the stillness of remembering that former day and setting it against the condition of change which the old tree showed him upon his return. Ancient and bare as when they first saw it, the tree was covered, then and now, in bright moss and from that, though Gondo had no way to know it yet, Twoody had given it the name “Greenholm”. It was designated on many maps at this time as the furthermost deeded land in the Shire. No hobbit other than Gondo or Twoody had come within miles of the place in all the long years, but its claim was staked and filed in the Office of Deeds leagues away in Assayer’s Office in the Buckland during Year Five of the Shire.

   What the Oldbuck would have seen on his return must have come as quite a surprise. Firstly, there was no way to refute the evidence that hobbits had come so far west in his absence; for the single dwelling, though set into a tree rather than dug into the ground, was certainly very hobbit-like in its manufacture. There was a nice round door, pointing north of course, and Gondo could see the remnants of an overgrown but still quite lovely garden which was composed of local flowers. Inside the cottage-hollow there was a small sitting room with two well-crafted and hobbit-sized chairs and even two comfortable stools for weary feet. A few now-mouldering blankets had been carefully rolled and put into the cedar drawers of a bedroom sideboard built onto the tree’s leeward side and there was even a small long-neglected birchwood writing desk beside a nearby fireplace. Exploring further, Gondo found that there was also an outdoor kitchen with an open cupboard and pantry, and, inside of that, a few mugs and plates, and even some old and now well-rusted washing buckets. In the small stone cooking stove which sat outside of the overhanging branches, Gondo found tarnished forks and a knife on the rusted, blackened grate. All of these tools and household goods were familiar to his eye and to his hand they measured as quite unmistakably hobbit-sized.

   What the Oldbuck thought of this discovery we cannot know; it is one of hobbit history’s most disappointing facts that few of the letters we have in Gondo’s hand from the later years discuss his observations upon returning. He would, or so we think, have been very surprised to see any evidence of hobbit settlements so far west in the Shire. We must also believe that he would later be more surprised to learn that his friend, that very same sedentary banker and unabashedly comfort-seeking city-dweller Twoody Swiftalk, had built this place all on his own. Certainly he could not have expected that. But what Gondo may have thought of this discovery of Greenholm, if it was ever recorded, has not survived and the other stories related to his return to the Shire would soon outstrip their importance.

   But, quite certainly, the Oldbuck must have wondered even then at just how long he had been gone.

   For whatever reason, no matter what distance he may have travelled earlier that day, we know that Gondo did not camp in the deserted treehouse of Greenholm that night. We know from the dates of his later meetings that he must have continued west down the Great Road all night; the stars over his head and his old walking-stick at his hand, urging him forward. He would have his first encounter with Shire-hobbits the next morning in the developing settlement of the Delvings.

   The events of the Oldbuck’s return play an important part in our telling of the Shire’s history but, yet again, we lack the written accounts of the principle characters. Therefore we must rely on the two Shire-hobbits who figure large in this part of the history. The things which they said or wrote inform much of what is recorded here.

   Our first reports will come from Eumaeus Sandyman, one of the groomsmen at Gondo’s wedding in Year Two of the Shire, who was the first of his name and an offshoot from the larger family of hobbits called the Sandheavers. No one knows why Eumaeus changed his name while his brothers did not, but the deed for his home in the Buckland was recorded in Year One with that very same “Sandyman” name. Eumaeus was a loyal friend and follower of Gondo’s and one of the first Bucklanders. In the earliest years of his life he did not know his letters nor write much beyond his name and the name of his family. His folk, the Sandheavers, had lived in the Bree-land for only a few years before moving to the Shire and had come from the Southlands below the Barrow-downs. They were goat-herders there, or so stories tell us, but they had become pig-farmers in the Bree-land and brought much of that stock with them upon the settlement of the Shire.

   Pigs do not care much for sandy soil and, perhaps, this is where the “Sandheavers” derived their name upon first entering the Bree-land; preferring the rich and muddy lands under hills to softer stone and loose earth of low hilltops. Many of Eumaeus’ brothers had settled between the Bridgefields and Stock when they first entered the Shire, but Eumaeus himself had decided to settle to the south of Buckland along the edge of the Green Hill Country where he tried, for a time, to return to the practice of goat-herding. Most of the Shirefolk believe Eumaeus named himself “Sandyman” in respect to his old family yet with a specific choice for starting his own life apart from theirs.

   Although Eumaeus was largely unlettered he is the perfect storyteller for our understanding of the time because of the significant part which he played in the Oldbuck’s return. Beyond that he was, by all accounts, quite a popular person with a keen but droll way of speaking, a sort of beloved clown-figure and town-crier who was seen as quite quotable by the Shire-hobbits of the second and third generation. Most notably among these was Arbogastes Bophin, a young nephew of Alaura’s, who tried to lampoon many of Eumaeus’ stories and witticisms into a series of comic articles published in THE SHIRE-RECKONING some forty years later. Therefore Eumaeus’ observations come to us, as most rumour usually does, through retelling by others who believe themselves to be wiser than the first-hand witness they are quoting. But if, as many people say, “imitation is indeed the highest form of flattery”, then Eumaeus Sandyman’s way of telling a story must’ve been well-loved indeed.

   “So preparatory to anything else it should be said that I, myself as I was at the time, was in no way nor in no manner readily accepting when from around the turning of a small hillock came a figure of middling hobbit height, evidently on the morning prowl, and calling: “Mace!” So suddenly nearby was the intruding figure that I started rather dizzily and, actuated by motives of inherent delicacy inasmuch as I have always believed in minding my own business, moved off but nevertheless remained on the alert with just a prudent shade of anxiety.”3

   For later developments we will also look at the important records of Ermenberga Bophin, the younger sister of Alaura (and mother of Arbogastes), who had come to the Shire and married in Year Seven. Ermy, as she was called, was two years younger than her sister but had also learned to write and read from an early age. She was one of the first copyists of THE SHIRE-RECKONING and after Alaura’s departure wrote many original articles for that broadsheet. Ermenberga was also known as one of the longest serving teachers in early Shire history, running a small schoolhouse in the Buckland for five decades and even accepting the Post-master position for a time after Alaura’s departure.

   Ermy was married to Euric Bophin, one of the Shire Reeves in Bridgefields, and they had many children together. Many became Shire Reeves (eventually shortened to “Sherriffs”) like their father, or farmers like their uncles and even educators like their mother. A few, like Arbogastes, sought the unique lifestyle of poets, social critics and political dissenters inspired by their famous aunt Aluara Fairheart.

   Ermenberga was as close to her sister as any of her siblings might claim to be, but far afield in her own views of independence. She visited Alaura often in the years after Gondo had departed and helped with the raising of Youngbuck for some time before Alaura’s second marriage. She was always called “dear Auntie Ermy” by Youngbuck and his siblings, and that title had stuck with many of the children who attended her classrooms over the years. She was as proud of that title as any which she later held and smiled softly and inwardly to hear it said.

   Auntie Ermy had held Alaura’s confidence for many decades and kept specific notes on their conversations, committing them to her own otherwise unspectacular diaries. Through her we have some of our only recordings of how Alaura may have felt about Oldbuck’s disappearance, her second wedding and the reason behind her third wedding.

   Strangely enough, all of Ermenberga’s letters and diaries were found preserved and intact in the excavation of the Great Smials and accompanied by the quotations of Eumaeus Sandyman, published and unpublished, which had become accredited to Arbogastes Bophin. Presumably these were part of an aborted attempt at some book Arbogastes was writing on the subject over fourteen hundred years before Goldilocks Gardener wrote her version of the story. Why they were collected at the Great Smials is unknown and little or nothing is written about the failed literary career of Arbogastes Bophin. If Youngbuck, as President Took, ever read these letters and notes or was in any way aware of their content remains unknowable.

   Careful reading will tell us that Ermenberga and Alaura differed on many many topics and thought about the politics of relationships in very different ways. But the journals of Auntie Ermy during Shire Years Twenty-Nine and Thirty, though written through her own sense of decorum (if not outright prudery), might be the best window into Alaura Fairheart’s own thoughts which remains available to history.

   “I can listen no longer in silence and must do something to settle her condition. She frets and frets and wishes to meet him by such means as are within her reach. He pierces her soul, as always, leaving her half in agony and half in hope even when she thought that such precious feelings were gone forever.

   "Will she offer herself to him again with her heart, broken as it was twenty-five years ago, renewed by her passions and blind to their past? Should one say that a husband forgets sooner than a wife, that his love has an earlier death? Perhaps, but I cannot dissuade her of his integrity. Unjust I may have been in my assessments, resentful of his leaving she may still be in hers. But in love she has been only practical and never inconstant. Have I not seen this? Shall I fail to understand her wishes in fear of her heart’s safety?

   "She believes that there is true love, true attachment and true constancy among hobbits, among husbands and wives and, most of all, among friends. Excellent sister! I wish I could help you in your uncertain fate.”4

 

   These two reporters will play heavily in the tale of the Oldbuck’s Return, though filtered through their own methods of recording. There is some certainty that Goldilocks Gardener may have had access to these accounts and, as this book concerns itself largely with presenting her version of the story, we will try to support or enhance it with what we know from these other sources regarding Gondo, Twoody and Alaura and the fate which befell them.

   But it is important to mention that the meeting of Gondo and Berty, which happened on the second day of Lithe in Year Twenty-Nine of the Shire, was not witnessed or commented on by either of these reporters. Seven other hobbits were present then (along with two allegedly unscrupulous Big Folk and four very loyal ponies) and if any of these had ever written of the event, those writings are currently lost to time. Much of what we will discuss next regarding Gondo’s impressions upon re-entering the Shire comes not from Goldilocks’ tale, not from the diaries of Auntie Ermenberga and not (directly that we know of) from the fireside gossip of Eumaeus Sandyman. It comes from the general gossip of Shirefolk of the time, found in letters and songs, and re-enforced by the later material as discovered at the excavation of the Great Smials.

Forgive, if you can, this lack of better accounting. But i believe that this is, with most careful research and all informed consideration, the best story we may put together without better evidence.

 

end of chapter four

Chapter End Notes

Notes(6/20/24)

1)  “President of the Shire” is an invention of my own which will be talked about later in this book and developed a bit further in Book III of The Fall of Arnor. Without opening up what might be a rather boring political debate at this stage of the writing I should simply say that, in my mind and my fiction, the structure of Shire government is meant to reflect failings, as I see them, within my own American template of late-colonial and rather idealistic government. There are many terms, like “president”, which sound very wisely-chosen at first yet, to my mind and in their practices of power, fail in their later usage.

2)  I have a very weird process when it comes to writing the poetry or songs in Tolkien fanfic. I often make way more lines of a poem than I ever intend to use as I try to become accustomed to the metre. For the Song of Eärendur (another work which fuels the longer Fall of Arnor) I’ve written much of that story in the style of Tolkien’s Beowulf translation and I may wind up publishing it somewhere later; yet another fragment of the working process. Some of this poem began with Tolkien’s Roads Go Ever On, a suitable source, but the metre and pattern changed through my playing with it. The poem itself was begun during Christmas week in 2023 and I now find myself wanting to go back and layer more of it into the previous chapters. There’s something very satisfying about the four line pattern and the idea that it comes from Alaura’s daughter that I feel I need to elaborate on. God, this book on hobbits is unending!

3)  Many, many things that I do here are not for Tolkien fans only but for my friends who are Joyce fans as well. I teach Joyce's work professionally and there are many friends reading this lengthy book about hobbits because of the respect they have for me in that academic world. The character of Eumaeus Sandyman and his way of talking are Easter eggs for fans of Joyce’s ULYSSES. I am echoing the “Eumaeus” episode here broadly, boldly, and with the greatest opportunity to make my friends who are reading this laugh at my own quirks. You are, as always, welcome to do so.

4) Yet another chance to play with narrative voices in Tolkien’s world. This bit comes from Jane Austen’s “Persuasion” and seems to hit all the right notes. I am not really an Austen fan or a regular reader of her work, but I wanted a voice for Auntie Ermy which seemed to romanticise her sister’s feelings while still sounding somewhat prudish. Austen seems the proper fit. I will expand on both these narrative styles in later chapters, so consider yourself warned.

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