Through Sorrow to Find Joy by Dawn Felagund

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Fanwork Notes

In Aman we have come through bliss to woe. The other now we will try: through sorrow to find joy; or freedom, at the least.

This has always been my favorite quote from The Silmarillion. Always having been very conscious of the ways that people hurt and oppress each other, Fëanor's decision in this moment to empower himself to seek joy (even if he miserably, miserably fails at that) has always inspired me. In this moment--still innocent of the Kinslaying and what will come after--he breaks the stranglehold upon him, and all becomes possible.

I will confess that now--working full-time and also a full-time graduate student attempting to become certified as a teacher--I often need to remember this moment and come "through sorrow to find joy." Zipping from task to task and deliberately silencing my muses takes its toll on me. I hope that this series will provide a place where, when I can spare a few moments for myself and my writing, I can store and share the results.

Fanwork Information

Summary:

This series will include small thinglets that do not fit in my other series.

New: Speak Faster. Nerdanel meets Ælfwine on Tol Eressëa. A double drabble.

Major Characters: Aegnor, Andreth, Celegorm, Eriol, Maedhros, Nerdanel

Major Relationships:

Artwork Type: No artwork type listed

Genre: Experimental, Fixed-Length Ficlet, General

Challenges:

Rating: General

Warnings: Mature Themes
Chapters: 5 Word Count: 1, 106
Posted on 20 November 2009 Updated on 11 August 2010

This fanwork is a work in progress.

Table of Contents

Seasons

Tyelkormo's first winter outside of Valinor draws him to ponder the circle of the seasons and their meaning to one immortal. A series of four drabbles.

The Swift Flame

Aegnor sees Andreth for the first time on the Summer Solstice. A double drabble.

White Nights

Maedhros prepares for the Fifth Battle.

The Turning

Nerdanel remembers joy. A drabble.

Speak Faster

Nerdanel meets Ælfwine on Tol Eressëa. A double drabble.

I blame Oshun for this one, as her comment on my Nerdanel ficlet The Pendant in the Stream sent my mind spinning off in all sorts of weird directions and gave me this ficlet.

2011 MEFA nominee--thank you, Elleth! :)

Comments

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Oh I love extensialist Tyelko here, it just suits him that he, being Fëanor's son in your verse (most certainly) would question nature and how she works, how the world around him changes from season to season while he is immortal. In this he feels as the opposite of Nelyo and yet not. The autumn one captivates his ambition so well, be it veiled or not as he lies there, reaping his reward and being crowned fitting his lineage. The summer one just feels so perfect, it is as if we see his character reflected back to us in the light of the trees. Simply wonderful and a piece that you can re-read often and yet discover something new.

Thank you, Rhapsy! I certainly had a lot going on in my mind as a wrote it, but the Elves sitting outside of \"the way of nature\" in their deathlessness has really given me something to think on lately. As you note, Tyelkormo seems the perfect character for this kind of musing. It\'s a bitter paradox for the Elves: They are bound to the world yet their permanence means that they can never fully be a part of it. I\'d better stop now before the plotrabbits start gnawing again when I have a lot of work to do today. ;)

Thanks, Angelica! Okay, yes, this series was an excuse to indulge in shameless imagery-writing; I\'m glad it worked. ;) I take a lot of comfort from the ways of nature, and I\'ve been thinking a lot lately on what it means to be Elven and completely removed from nature\'s impermanence. This series starts musing on that.

Thank you, Ithilwen! You read it in the aftermath of a blizzard, and I wrote it as the weather began to really show signs of winter here, which is always a difficult time for me; I needed this piece to remind me that, yes, there is a purpose to winter and to look forward to those first spring leaves! :)

He'd already lived in the North for several centuries under the Sun by then, hadn't he? But I suppose the inner conditions had never so colluded with the outer conditions till then. The tacks are a telling touch--he doesn't seem to bother picking them up from the floor either, although they are hazardous things to leave lying there (presumably even for Noldorion heroes).

My apologies for the lateness of this reply, Himring. I just replied to a new review and realized that I had missed replying to yours. :(

You are right that I wanted the environmental conditions to exacerbate an existing ... frailty? I hesitate to say madness, because I don't think Maedhros is *quite* there at this point. :) This is very much from personal experience; the weather has profound effects on my mood, which tends to swing quite a bit to start. There is a reason why most of the SWG's projects and other mischief that I get myself into tend to occur in the summer. ;)

On the tacks--exactly! You know my Big Brother Maedhros well enough to know that he would normally *never* allow tacks on the floor where they might hurt someone. ;)

Thanks so much for reading and commenting!

Oh, that's lovely. You certainly did take off in an expected direction--like Nerdanel's own life. She explores the concept of mortality through the prism of having one's own expectations of a long Ages flowing in one particular vein only to find it cut incredibly short. Her empathy for the shortness of life given to mortals comes from a very personal place.

Thank you, Oshun! I'm glad you liked it, especially since it was our conversation that inspired it in the first place. :)

Nerdanel is endlessly fascinating to me. (Does it show?? :D) She's very unlike most of JRRT's female characters. Of course, CT had to cut almost everything about her from the books ... >:^(

Thank you, Binka! :) When I first wrote it, I started with something like the line, "He was obviously in haste," and promptly smacked myself on the wrist and uttered that mantra of writers' workshops, "Show don't tell, show don't tell." ;) I'm glad those details came through for you! :) I'm realizing now, too, that part of it was probably inspired too by the copy of Book of Lost Tales 1 on my shelf where Aelfwine looks very impatient for a (rather old-looking) Rumil to get on with it! :)

I made a typo above. I meant unexpected. I adore Nerdanel--due largely to the cut material and your interpretation in AMC. I am doing a Nerdanel story at the moment, which just keeps growing. I like craft and skill better than magic (ahem, Luthien), and an interesting personal life (i.e., one with some conflict and sturggles--not just a happily ever after) to make a woman character interesting to me.

Spilling over onto two comments for a story that is barely a ficlet--that means you've engaged your reader.

And I knew you meant unexpected! :D I was wondering if you'd make a correction in another comment or email me and ask me to edit in the correction with my mad moderatorly skillz. ;)

It depends on the magic for me. Magic works for me if it has a basis in some sort of craft or skill. Like Pandemonium's descriptions of the "magic" workings undertaken by Annatar and Samaril in The Apprentice. OMG. But, yeah, when a character just pulls magic out of her arse, like deciding to grow her hair extra long and weave a magic cloak out of it *ahem*, then I tend not to be impressed. It feels like a creative cop-out to me. It's easy to get out of plot binds with *poof!* magic! If JRRT had shown how Luthien learned her magic or worked it; if he had described the experience or her perception (and I realize most of that would not work with the tone in the Silm), then I would probably like that part of the story much more.

I like so much about Nerdanel. I like that we see her personal life. I like that she's not elevated as some grand beauty--she's even ugly! (By Elven standards anyway.) Before CT mauled the manuscript, she was defined by her work as well as (not just) her marriage to Feanor and mother of seven sons. I like that she clearly had enough faith in herself to stand up to Feanor. And I like that her fate isn't tied to padding around after a man--one reason that I've tried to show her life after Feanor left as something more than constant introspective angst. (Don't know how well I've done with that because there's been some of the introspective angst too! :)

You're doing it again, you know? Next thing you know, I'll be putting aside what I should be doing and writing something collected from where my mind has wandered during this conversation. ;)