An interesting argument by Aprilertuile  

Upon his return from his most recent hunt with Oromë’s people, Tyelkormo saw a servant of the house come to him in a hurry.

“Prince Tyelkormo, your father wishes to speak to you at the earliest possibility.”

Tyelkormo snorted at that, faintly amused. His father certainly didn’t word it this way. Nevertheless, he entered the house and went to leave his bag in his rooms, and went to find his father, finding him in his office, slaving over what looked like an official letter.

“You wanted to see me, father?”

“Yes, just a moment, take a seat, I won’t be long.”

Tyelkormo had to bite back a smirk at that: his father’s ‘I won’t be long’ could mean he needed a few moments OR that he needed a couple of days and would forget everything until he was done. He dearly hoped it’d be on the shortest end for the occasion as he had other plans than to sleep on his father’s office couch.

“Alright, I’m done. Thank you for your patience.”

“Pleasure dad. So. Why did you want to talk to me?”

“I received a letter of complaints from my father. You know he is... Very involved in the... life of his children and grand-children...”

“By this I think you mean our king is a meddling nuisance who doesn’t take no for an answer easily and wants to marry us all, his children and grand-children to the first passing elf of the opposite gender he can find.”

“Well... I was trying to be tactful for my father’s sake but yes.”

Tyelkormo snorted in amusement at that.

“I prefer honesty to diplomacy.”

“He told me you terrified the girls he tried to introduce you to.”

“Terrified... no... I merely tried to share my hobbies with the women who claimed they loved me and wanted to share the rest of their lives with me. Surely they loved me for my shining personality after all, right?”

“Dare I ask what you did exactly?” Fëanáro asked with a tired sigh.

“I took the darling court raised ladies hunting and taught them how to kill, clean and carve a rabbit with minimal equipment.” Tyelkormo said with a predatory grin that showed too much teeth.

“Did you have to?” Fëanáro sighed tiredly.

“Frankly? Yes.”

“Turko...”

“Father.” Tyelkormo answered in the same tone.

Fëanáro looked tiredly at his son:

“Don’t you want to settle down? Find a significant other to share your life?”

“No? Really not? Why would I?”

“Because nothing is like the relationship you can share with someone you love?”

“Father, in case the numerous years of me being openly disgusted by my brother’s shenanigans with boyfriends and girlfriends and maiafriends didn’t give it away... I’m not interested.”

“Not... interested?” Fëanáro asked like it was a revelation.

Tyelkormo blinked at that.

“Wait you really didn’t notice?”

“No? What do you mean not interested? Are you not interested like Maitimo who just doesn’t like girls but has hooked up with boys in the past or...?”

“No father. Not interested as in I think that sex is the pointless exchange of disgusting bodily fluid and I want strictly not part in it.”

“That’s... Well... Yes? And that coming from the hunter who regularly has his hands covered in I prefer not to imagine what from the preys he catches, let me say I find your definition of sex interesting.”

“Hunting is always done with a clear purpose. Safety, food, survival. Sex is a reproductive drive, mainly moved for species’ survival, however on Valinor, our lives aren’t threatened... Mostly. So we can only multiply and so there is no real need to reproduce, hence, sex is useless in the grand scheme of things.”

“That’s a way to consider it. But what about companionship? Don’t you miss having a partner at your side? Someone to walk hand in hand with? Someone who’ll wait for you at home? Someone to eat with after a long day? Someone to cuddle with? Without even considering sex?”

“I don’t. I have companionship, but it’s... I like my freedom above all. I love that I can follow Oromë on Hunts at a moment’s notice always, that I can just... Pick up my hunting gear and go on a whim without having to justify my decision to an intrusive other beforehand.”

Fëanáro tilted his head to the side at that, listening with attention. It made Tyelkormo smile: his father was always very attentive to his children’s words when they expressed something dear to them. It was always heart-warming to remember that their father was always interested in everything that mattered to his brothers and him, no matter what it was.

“I don’t feel the need to be close to someone else. I have my brothers and I do hold their hands and cuddle with them sometimes when we’re together. I have my hunting partners and we are close together to the point where no one will bat an eye if I get up to them and hug them if I feel like it.”

“Oh?”

“Oromë’s Hunt has some very strict rules, father. Not having a wife allows me to follow his Horn to a Hunt often enough to be counted as one of His Hunters. I like this life. I like the fact that I participate in protecting our realm against violent creatures. That I participate in the life of our realm by providing food and furs and whatnot. I like having friends I know I can trust with my life.”

“And that’s not something you think a wife would bring you?”

“Having a wife would force me to spend more time at home. So instead of sharing my time between Oromë’s Hunt and the palace for official duty, I’d have to share my time between Oromë’s Hunt and the palace AND the company of this hypothetical wife. And since it was made clear that it’s out of the question that any one of us drops out of having princely duty... How long before Oromë tells me that I’m not there often enough and I’m welcome as a guest but not a member of his Hunt? Before I lose what I love the most in my life and what brings me the most pride?”

“I see...”

“Also I think you have a grossly inaccurate idea of the type of women your esteemed father has tried to foist on me so far if you truly believe I can enjoy their company or that they'll enjoy mine in any way, shape or form.”

Fëanáro grimaced and nodded:

“Probably.”

“As for the supposed joy of living with someone else... I need to remind you that I spend most of my time living with a group of hunters in Oromë’s Woods during the Hunts with little to no privacy possible, and the rest of my time either here with you and my brothers or in the palace with far too many courtiers and servants and cousins everywhere and when I go back to my home... I like my peace and quiet. I like being able to just... Curl up on the bed with my dog and a book and being able to just fall asleep like that without having someone crying that they don’t want a dog on the furniture. I want to be able to let Huan in the house when it rains without having an annoyance telling me that my dog is damaging the furniture. My home is my private space, and I want to keep it that way. It’s where I go when I want to have a break from being sociable. I don’t want company when I’m there. I go there specifically when I do NOT want company of any sort. A significant other would be a gross invasion in my private life, and a larger than appreciated demand on my time.”

“That... Is a way to think about romantic relationships I suppose...” Fëanáro mused quietly.

“I think it’s a way to conscientiously not consider a romantic relationship, more to the point, but yes...”

“But... Even considering your interesting definition of sex and relationship, and the need to reproduce for species survival that we don’t have an issue with on Valinor, don’t you want children?”

“Father, father dear, my most beloved father...”

“Child...”

“What on Ëa made you think I want children? Children are only great when I can give them back to their parents.”

“I like children.” Fëanáro pointed out mildly.

“Well you and mom are young; you can make more if that’s your thing, but don’t saddle me with your desire for more spawns.”

“You’re one of the spawns in question darling child of mine.”

“I know, and I know our family. We’re an endless source of drama. I prefer to remain free to pursue my dreams rather than shackle myself to children who will need their father around. I’m not father material. I’m a hunter first and foremost, dedicated to my Craft of choice.”

“Alright then. I’ll talk to my father and try to convince him to leave you alone. But... You are still young? I don’t want you to regret rejecting my father’s help in the future...”

“Dad, even in the eventuality that in some improbable future sex becomes something else than a gross loss of time, and I change my mind and decide to abandon my dream life for the displeasure of having an invasive other and a miniature thing in need of a father, I can promise you that grand-father Finwë will be the very last person on Ëa that I’ll involve in the process. And considering your tales of how you met mom, you’re the very last person able to tell me that grand-father Finwë’s help is necessary to find a good match.”

“My father isn’t that bad, little love.”

Tyelkormo raised an eyebrow at that, looking judgementally at his father.

“Alright so he can be a bit... Persistent.”

“Hm...”

“And perhaps doesn’t quite listen when you express your desires...”

“Hm hm.”

“And perhaps he does what he thinks is best instead of what really is best...”

“No offence dad, but your father has fantasies about our lives that are particularly disturbing. Last girl he introduced me to, he barely managed to tell me her name before he told us how he envisioned our wedding and future children. I was that far away from making a scandal in the middle of court just to get rid permanently of his marital ambitions for me.”

“How is horrifying a few court ladies and angering some of my father’s lords in any way ‘avoiding’ a scandal?” Fëanáro asked deadpan.

“Is that a challenge to do worse?” Tyelkormo asked suddenly, toothy smile growing.

“No.”

“Oh... But dad!”

“I already agreed to keep my father away from your personal life, can you please agree to not do worst to antagonize the court?”

“Of course father, it’s asked so nicely, I’m always happy to serve...”

“... I don’t say it often... But I hope you get called on a long hunt soon, you clearly need a good excuse to avoid the palace for some times. Now shoo, get gone, and go talk to your mother, she had something to ask you. Something about bringing back home a skull for her, I didn’t quite follow.”

“Sure, always happy to help. Thanks dad.”

Fëanáro snorted as Tyelkormo left his office cheerfully. He himself had a letter to pen for his father to try to convince him to leave Tyelkormo alone. That was going to be... An interesting conversation certainly.

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