Comments on Driftwood

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I think this is amazing Pandë - what an introduction to how Annatar came to Lindon and why he was rejected.

To begin with, I thought the part with the raven was masterly, and really the mindspeech reminded me of Julian May's Saga of the Pliocene Exiles books, which are brilliant in how they show such things.

Elrond and Annatar - what can I say. Everything Annatar said sounded so reasonable, so intelligent. he's personable, conversable, and knows his craft. Elrond was interested, charmed, loosened up, and then, then  - they shook hands. Such a normal thing to do!

Now that is a beautiful, dramatic and prophetic piece of writing:

The River of Time stopped at that moment.  Elrond's eyes locked with Annatar's, and their hands remained gripped while the sun and the stars ceased their stately dance, and the sea froze into stone.  Elrond broke the handshake first and made his decision.

Who are you?  Elrond demanded when he returned Annatar's firm handshake, and the exhilarating shock shot up his neck to burst with familiar warmth in his mind.  Annatar's bright eyes widened.  He feels it, too, but he is surprised by its strength.

Master, please tell me.  Please. Who are you? Elrond had pleaded.  A wall slammed down to barricade Annatar's thoughts, but not before Elrond perceived an elusive presence that slithered back into the shadows. 

What an absolutely superb and believable story of why Annatar was not welcomed in Gil-galad's court. A really amazing piece all round!



Good to know you found this "interesting," Aiwen.   In answer to your question, from the story notes:

Although written as a stand-alone story, Driftwood will eventually become the first chapter of the nascent Eregion novellas (sort of a James Michener meets Middle-earth family saga) I have planned.

I've told myself that I must finish The Elendilmir before I start on the Eregion novellas, but I doubt that I'll hold to that, i.e., I'll work on them in parallel. 

I hope no one took your advice and skipped over the first section of this tale, because the casual cruelty of the raven's end is the perfect way to introduce your Annatar. Elrond comes so close to disaster here! To think that all that saves him (and Gil-Galad) from meeting Celebrimbor's fate is the smell of ozone...

I love the details and description woven throughout the story.

The raven… It seems normal at first, and then-- we find out what Sauron’s up to. Chilling how he orchestrated this. (Not that I expected different, especially your DL.)

As for Elrond: I adore that he kept his focus, no matter the “heartwarming” details.

 I think most of us who are descended from Finwë are a bit crazy although you seem sane enough.

That made me laugh.

“To bring aid to you.  Your struggles to heal the Marring inflicted by Morgoth Bauglir are known to us in the West.  I have been sent as an emissary to assist in the healing of Middle-earth.

And so it begins…

The play of politics (Beleriand versus Aman) is fascinating to glimpse, and rings true.

The conversation Elrond and Annatar have on the walk back is stunning. Annatar is giving Elrond just enough information to be interested, and enough that turning him aside would be seemingly an unwise decision.

And yet, Elrond remains observant, enough to catch the one lapse Annatar makes. And then the revelation of the *true* reason Elrond rejected Annatar’s overture.

It was bad enough that he was named "Peredhel" due to his mortal blood.   Reminding others of his heritage from the Fays might make it that much worse, but maybe it was that very heritage that warned him now.

These two sentences… They feel *right*, and that’s all I can say, save that they’ve given me things to think about.

Perhaps I am a little mad, too.

Better a little mad than living side-by-side with Sauron.

This is a spectacular story, and I love Elrond’s characterization.

Thanks so much, Indy!  First, I'm very relieved that you liked my characterization of Elrond.  He's a popular figure in fan fiction so it has been tricky (for me) to get a distinctive handle on his personality as I see him in the greater whole of the Pandë!verse. I could have (and maybe should have) just stopped at the lack of calluses on Annatar's hands as the giveaway (he sometimes overlooks the details, e.g., the calluses, guards at the entrance to the Sammath Naur), but those Maiarin signs of recognition have appeared elsewhere, notably "Trinity" so I couldn't resist tossing them into the story.

The beginning strongly reminded me of a certain scene from the movie "The Excalibur" -- when a raven plucked an eye from a dead body hanging on a tree. Some might say, an unnecessary detail, but I think the atmosphere benefits from it a great deal. And in your story, the prologue creates that lurking feeling that something horrific will happen, sooner or later. Besides, it's an excellent dive into the mind of a bird!

And then, the meeting of the two giants of the universe! Ah. The conversation is splendid, and while I read I realized I no longer was sure who interrogated whom.

This particular line made my hair rising on my nape:

“To bring aid to you."

It was blood-freezing, given everything that happened later. But, I'm of course eagerly waiting to read your version of the entire story. I agree wholeheartedly with Spiced Wine's comment here; this definitely must compete in this year's MEFAs :) What a fascinating beginning of the Eregion novellas!

Thank you for sharing this, and apologies for a delayed review.

PS. Loved, loved, loved Gil-galad and the lizard! :D



Thanks so much, Binka!  No apologies necessary.  I know how busy you are and what RL demands of you these days (((hugs))).

You know, I think you hit upon an image that must have been lurking there in my mind as I was writing this:  that scene from "Excalibur."*  That feeling for foreboding is exactly what I was going for here so I am glad it came through for you.  Also, I'm very flattered that you and Spiced Wine (and Rey, who made a similar comment on the Many paths to Tread archive) think this is worthy of a MEFA nomination.

Re: Gil-galad and the lizard.  I think Darth Fingon's eccentric elves are exerting their influence on me!  I figured Gil-galad needed an iguana based on Aldarion's remarks in the Darwen fic. :^D

 

Thanks again!

Excellent account of Sauron's entry into Elven high society as the mysterious emissary from Aman.  The opening with the lustful and ill-fated raven was chilling; how apt that she be beguiled to her death, as have been so many others, by Sauron's fair promises. And then the meeting with Elrond, who is smarter than the raven, but equally attracted by what the disguised Sauron is offering - healthful technology for the preservation of lore, bath-houses with constant hot water, and (I laughed, but it was very plausible) microscopes for the fruit fly generation experiments of Elrond's friend.  

Elrond is not the first to be attracted by Sauron's person and promises; but he is one of the rare few who does not accept them.  I love the way both Annatar and Elrond are written here; Elrond is not just the kind-as-summer Elven doctor and resort owner; he's something Other, and it comes in very handy at times.  

I can only hope that at some point, Pandemonium is going to write Sauron's encounter with Elrond's foremother Luthien.  Please?

This is my MEFA 2011 review:

The story opens with a scene told from a most unusual point of view which, because of the non-human nature of the narrator, is both fascinating and, in places, repulsive in its authenticity. Through the eyes of this creature it is possible to begin to guess the identity of the watched man, who behaves in a seemingly strange way, though his actions have a very definite purpose.

Adding this superb preamble to the encounter between Elrond and this mysterious character in dramatic circumstances only highlights the suspense of the scene, as we know what Elrond does not. While reading this story I continuously felt like screaming "Beware!" because pandemonium_213's Sauron in his fair guise can't be any more beguiling, in so many different levels, to someone like Elrond (or to the poor little creature who witnessed the truth). The dialogue between the two men is riveting. Annatar is magnificent, convincing and full of charisma. Elrond's caution is cast to one side by his thirst for knowledge; the temptation the stranger dangles before his eyes to offer guidance to explore his untapped powers is irresistible. Annatar is about to achieve his ends but he has not allowed for Elrond's gift (the inheritance from Melian) and has additionally underestimated his great powers of observation. What a twist, even if we know the final outcome!

This is pandemonium_213 at her very best.

 

Subtle cruelty is always shocking because it is so casual.  So easily done.  A deciever should be beautiful and intelligent and appealing.  He should tempt you with your heart's desires, and show you the wonders of the world available to you if you will just open your heart and soul to him.  So Annatar is perfect to me.  That nagging feeling that something is off is so annoying when you meet someone you would love to like, so for Elrond, who is more than elf, or human, it must be maddening.  

I love the details, the widow peeking through her fingers, the pants that are a bit short, the height and bearing of Annatar that remind Elrond of Maedhros.  The little fox he once saved, the plumbing and the parchment and the roses.  I love how you combine science and Tolkiens world, because it does make sense if you look at it that way and not as "magic" (if the elves didn't see it as magic, why would I).  

Elrond is lovely in his uncertainty, just learning to trust in his abilities maybe?  But he is already powerful and I like that while he was tempted, he did trust his own instincts.  

This is a story that sticks to you, with images and possibilities.  What's not to love in that?

  



Wow, thanks so much, Levade!  Truly, I went into full-on squeeing when I read your review, in particular the first paragraph.  You "get" exactly what I am trying to do with Sauron throughout my whole 'verse: to give him the capability of seduction.  By that I mean not sexual seduction (my Sauron is a vanilla kind of guy in that regard for specific reasons), but intellectual and emotional seduction.  

When I first stumbled into Tolkien fandom/fan fiction in late 2006 (aided and abetted by Dawn and her landmark Another Man's Cage), I came across a number of versions of Sauron, but almost to a one, the Dark Lord was portrayed as an obvious (to the reader) villain.  And yet, the Noldor of Eregion welcomed him.  That did not sit right at all with me.  Why in the world would an astute people like the Elves of Ost-in-Edhil welcome an oily bad guy practically rubbing his hands together and cackling "Bwahahaha!" into their midst?  I still encounter that interpretation although a bit less often these days.  So, I aimed for making a more sympathetic villain, a deceiver exactly as you described, one who still has genuine elements of good in him (a nod to Tolkien's remark that Sauron was "not wholly evil" and not nihilistic like his Big Boss, Melkor), but who is also capable of unspeakable cruelty, which he handily justifies as his means to his ends.

Yep, "magic," which has a scientifictitious basis in my tertiary world/alternative history of Tolkien's secondary world, does not come easily to anyone.  I'm really glad Elrond came across as he did.  I meant to convey him with that uncertainty, but, as you noted, with good instincts.

"That nagging feeling that something is off is so annoying when you meet someone you would love to like..."

OMG, yes, that is spot-on.  I have met (and I am sure you have, too) people like that, including people with a lot of power.  A few CEOs and sr. VPs in my industry come to mind.  Some come across as genuinely nice guys but will make a "business decision" to cut hundreds of jobs, which results in a lot of angst and misery, or turn around and figuratively knife a competitor or three in the back.  Then they go home, walk the dog, and go to the kids' soccer game.  And there are those in power (largely men) who wield much higher stakes than those in my milieu.  A lot of cognitive dissonance generated there.

Again, thanks a million, Levade, for the wonderful review. :^)

This is perfect. When you gave the hint about the scent of lightning, eariler, I was wracking my brains thinking "who could Elrond have met, who had some parallel to Annatar"? And the misdirection about his lack of calluses is perfect: although it is a true sign too, as far as it goes.

I loved the moment in which Elrond was all but taken in . . .

Your crack about Gil-galad's iguanas over on DW put me in the mood to reread this delicious piece, which is one of your stories that has always stuck in my memory. I love everything about this story -- the description, the characterization, the interplay between Elrond and Annatar and Elrond and Gil-galad. The opening scene with the raven is chilling and perfectly done. You have a real gift!

Someone on SWG's Discord recommended this wonderful story. It is such a good description of Elrond and Annatar meeting for the first time, and of what Annatar was offering to Gil-galad, Elrond and Lindon. Knowledge and innovation are very attractive "gifts" to be offering, and effort he puts into the seduction of Elrond with these promises comes across perfectly. The beginning section of the raven being seduced into her death set the tone. Fantastic and enjoyable. ❤️